Lunarly probing, Japan


Japan plans to land rover on moon in 2018 / April 26, 2015
JAXA Japan’s space agency announced this week that the country would put an unmanned rover on the surface of the moon by 2018, joining an elite club of nations that have explored Earth’s satellite
“This is an initial step and a lot of procedures are still ahead before the plan is formally approved,” a JAXA spokesperson told reporters. If it is approved, the agency will reportedly use its Epsilon solid-fuel rocket technology to carry and deploy a SLIM probe — the acronym stands for “Smart Lander for Investigating Moon”


snark-openThe JAXA spokesperson went on to explain that, left_quoter_14x24upon landing on the moon the SLIM moon probe will send and receive by fax* all of its data.right_quoter_13x24snark-closed

*The joke being that all Japanese companies, large and small, still rely fax machines even though they have advanced email and cloud services at their disposal.
japan marvin invades the moon


Carp Energy® — w0oT!~

carp energy drink japan baseball
CARP product ranking, Hiroshima brand shop
(the official website’s bizarro translation)
the tenth place goes to Carp Energy®…this cheerful infusion drink has the “Soul of Red” which is the motto of the spirit of Hiroshima citizens in their carp-loving prefecture

And, if Carp Energy® is not enough fun for you, Hiroshima branded “Carp Wine” and “Carp beer” are available too!


carp-uniform-One of the fun things about living in Japan but being from Chicago is that logo for the Hiroshima Toyo Carp baseball team is the Japanese-Bizarro World version of my hometown Chicago Cubs team.

Hiroshima Carp vs Chicago Cubs

It’s a hoot to wander around Chicago on vacation wearing this Cubs-looking cap from an alternative universe that reads “CARP” on the back.


Ok, ok, I suppose the logo of the Hiroshima Carp is just a rip-off of the Cincinnati Reds (Wiki), but I prefer telling Chicago folks that the Hiroshima CARP are Japan’s Bizarro World version of the Cubs (even though the Hiroshima CARP have been losers* forever like the Cubs).



Vote for “GOT OTER UKI”!

“GOT OTER UKI’ aka Goto Teruki is obviously the best candidate running for the upcoming elections in Chiyoda-ku, Tokyo. W0oT~!


This year’s poster where he writes his name Goto Teruki in proper Japanese characters “goto-teruki-big” across his privates is actually a big improvement over the romanization of his name “GOT OTER UKI” on Goto Teruki’s 2013 campaign poster.

Check out Goto’s official website (in Japanese).
Information in English about his previous campaign platform at:

The 3Yen has covered silliness about the more wacky political candidates in Japan includes:


Japan stinks


As if Burger King Japan’s Whooper Whopper™ hamburger scent perfume was not weird enough.


syntho-perfumeThe Nose Knows: New perfumes offer broad range of scents, including…snow and dirt
Times Free Press | 2015/apr/19
the strangest comes from Japan-based Comme des Garcons Series 6: Synthetic, which gives users the chance to dab the odor of a Wild West oil boomtown behind ear lobes…the base notes include “town gas,” “grilled” cigarettes, bitumen (tar), bergamot (citrus), opoponax (balsamic, honey-like), styrax (vanilla-like) and pyrogenic (fire) …more…

Sometimes you have to wonder if fashion houses, especially Japanese ones, are just trolling us with perfume scented with burnt cigarettes, tar, and natural gas.

Previous smelly reports on the 3Yen include:


Bread Bed & Beyond … from Japan

Speaking of tasteless “house-makings” aka kagu/家具 (furniture)…

Time To Chill On Some Bread Chairs / April 2015
…Nitori offers a line up of bread themed furniture which has become a popular series. These bread chairs are reclining and can be set to 5 different angles…available on the Nitori website, for a decently cheap price of ¥3800...more


Previous reports crappy kagu cum funiture on the 3Yen include:


Green dogless dog…only in Japan

left_quoter_14x24That way madness lies. A tsukemono (pickled cucumber) dog.right_quoter_13x24
tsukemono-dogMulboyne — Mulboyne (@Mulboyne) April 17, 2015

Previous reports weird wiener reports on the 3Yen include:


Taco Bell Japan’s no-Access Rap

The new Tokyo Taco Bell is the first in world to have stairs to prevent those pesky handicapped people from entering. (See 1:28 in the video.)

Click to play video.

Previous reports tako/taco reports on the 3Yen include:

tako-in-japanese Note:
Besides Taco Bell Japan’s new no-handicapped-access store, the “lame” joke is that the word tako (タコ) in Japanese means octopus and fittingly can be slang for a “stupid person.”

‘Hello, I want to suck your soul.’

Hokazono-Masayleft_quoter_14x24Hello, I’m Aiko Chihara and I want to suck your soul.right_quoter_13x24

Robotic Customer Service? In This Japanese Store, That’s the Point
Wall Street Journal / JRT blog / April 16, 2015
Toshiba Corp. will debut its humanoid robot at the information desk of an upscale department store in Tokyoto provide audio guidance to customersThe robot’s appearance wasn’t modeled on any specific person but was designed to give a friendly impression at the Mitsukoshi department store in Nihonbashi, on Monday and Tuesday…more..

Previous reports of robot working girls on the 3Yen include: