Wait. It gets better than the teddy bear character FaFa-kun‘s “Oriental Woody” (ファーファ オリエンタル ウッディ). He will, ″make it all white©″.
BEAVIS: Heh heh. Heh heh. He said WOOD. Heh heh.
BUTTHEAD: Hey Beavis. They like, UH-huh UH-huh UH-huh, they found your phallus. It’s two inches long. UH-huh. UH-huh. UH-huh.
—from Beavis and Butthead, “The Mystery of Morning Wood”
Previous puerile posts of Japanese “wood” include:
(Goofy Google Translate of Wiki): Kenmin Foods Co., Ltd. of Kobe is a rice noodle manufacturer that is best known for its “Welcome to the Kenmin Kingdom” ad campaign. Kenmin’s ads are known for their eerie content and surreal product image.
Previous posts of Japan’s fun ads for very bent noodles include:
Three years ago, in Anti‑surveillance chic from Japan (2013-01-29) →
we covered these ″ Invisibility Glasses″ of Professor Isao Echizen at Tokyo’s National Institute of Informatics. Well, the professor is back with better haircut and mega-funding from Nissey Corp.
For a mere ¥36,000 or about $331 USD, you can buy the new ″ Privacy Visor″ Nissey Corp., and you too can defeat the forces of evil with style with your own Gort Visor™ (Wiki). →
Learn more about the new visor from the Nissey’s Press Release.
Our previous reports on Japanese digital masking trends include:
• Facial recognition for masked Japanese (3Yen / 2006-01-14)
• Digital makeup, Japanese ↓ (3Yen / 2011-04-18)
Many times I think entertainment venues in Tokyo are just trolling us with click bait…
The VibeBar–Wild One (dildo bar) click to view.
Learn more at the official website that is is sort-of-bilingual at: vibebar.jp
Previous “upstanding” reports with “good vibes” include::
A pawn shop ad seen on the back of bus in Kyoto Japan….
Google Translate of fukuyou78.com:
Please bring your precious metals, expensive brand goods, home appliances, antique musical instruments, etc. as pawn, or you can purchase them at the Fukuyou Pawn shops of Kyoto. We give the highest assessments, and offer the best prices.
Previous fuckqued reports include:
Even in relatively vandalism-free Japan, it is going to take a large support staff →
to keep the ‘mystery touch’ from getting to be too much of a “GET SURPRISE!”
Learn more about the time and exact location of the event at the official Japanese website of Puré Gummy™: kanro.co.jp/jurepure
Our previous gummy/mouthy news includes:
Hey, did you see the new Japanese TV commerical featuring me as a foreign, big-snouted, male chauvinist pig?
I’m especially proud of my big kabe-don scene where the young housewife working as an abused supermarket stock clerk eats me! …
Also check out the second commerial with the same “Iberian pig” (イベリコ豚) playing a foreign exercise instructor who gets eaten by a housewife.
 Ok, ok, the commerical does not star me. I look much more pig-like. I have a much more pink piggy complexion, I sport a bigger snout, and I am more sparsely bristled than the Japanese actor just pretending to be a foreign pig.
Kabe-don (壁ドン)—loosely meaning, “hitting a wall”—is a “romantic” way Japanese in manga/comics proclaim their affection (and is a form of Japanese sexual harrassment). You can learn more details about kabe-don at:
Kotaku.com: Manga trope appears–confuses some
Our previous piggy reports include:
Not an April Fool’s story…
Japan Lipstick Industry Is Projected to Reach a Significant Height in Its Market Growth as the 2016 Consumer Demands Are Evolving
…a detailed analysis of this industry on the basis of the ongoing market trends, in addition to the market drivers, demand inhibitors, resource utilization, market challenges…
SBWIRE — 04/01/2016 blah, blah, blah…
YVE-style.com/makeup/japanese-makeup-style: The above photo was labled “traditional” Japanese makeup, ha, ha.
Our previous lipstick reports include:
Longtime 3Yen reader, Lou Minatti, writes:
Oh My Buddha!
It’s a Sunday here in ‘Merica and during a commercial TV break for “Face The Nation” they suddenly show a new 90 second commercial for this fairly new 2020 Non Stop Tokyo Orympic Tentacle Pr0n campaign:
And this is only the beginning FOUR YEARS IN ADVANCE!!!!!
And if you go to the bottom of the above page, you’ll see that it is all part of the Tokyo Metropolitan Government! Awwww Yeeeaaahhhhh!!!!! :D
I can imagine the various monstrosities that you are already starting to see inside ground zero. :)
Mayu Matsuoka and a PR tie-in is featured the Lotte commercial below for “NO THINK”. However, it is hard to tell where where the promotion of the seemingly-real, lower-calorie, “NO THINK” product ends and the April Fools’ joke starts (lotte.co.jp/products/brand/soh/aprilfool/).
Actually, the product’s name is “爽” (Chinese shuang3 or Japanese shoso) meaning ‘refreshing’, and “NO THINK” is just the slogan.
Previous engRish reports of frozen Japanese confectionaries include: