July 20 is that special time — Japanese HAMBURGER DAY!

No Idol No Burger!」We are West Japan HamburgirlZ!
(details at: tofugu.com)

Micro-Godzilla’s Big Mac attack!

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Is that a miffed burger or an iffy burger?

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“With Everything Burger” (“zenbu nose baagaa” or 全部のせバーガー): lettuce, cabbage, egg, a slice of cheese, a cheeseburger, a rib patty, a fried shrimp patty, a beef patty, pickles and various sauces, like ketchup, mayo, and teriyaki sauce.

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I really really really really like you extra moist Diane

daine_is_extra_moist
 
♬~ I Really Really Really Really Like You extra Moist Diane.

moist diane story

Non-silicon playtime is squeaky—oil is sticky. It’s common sense to approach nether-hair care of the next generation. A smooth soap-job provides comfort without being too squeaky. Then, a good lube job can gently dirt the hair, oil treatment to penetrate deeply. Uniquely formulated lube without stickiness provides a slippery sleek finish-cum-happy ending.″

translated japanese by bing

extra moist diane title

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For more fun with Japanese-engrish, check out:

 



 

FaFa’s Oriental Woody

Oh dear…
oriental-woodylisa-sometimes_bigger Lisa Sometimes @MsLisaSometimes June 27, 2016

 

 

Wait. It gets better than the teddy bear character FaFa-kun‘s “Oriental Woody” (ファーファ オリエンタル ウッディ). He will, make it all white©″.
FaFa-combo

he-said-woodBEAVIS: Heh heh. Heh heh. He said WOOD. Heh heh.
BUTTHEAD: Hey Beavis. They like, UH-huh UH-huh UH-huh, they found your phallus. It’s two inches long. UH-huh. UH-huh. UH-huh.
   —from Beavis and Butthead, “The Mystery of Morning Wood

 

Previous puerile posts of Japanese “wood” include:


 

 


Welcome to Kenmin Kingdom of Noodly Nippon

 Kenmin-kingdomAnthony

Anthony d'Avis (@ozAntinnippon) June 25, 2016

 

(Goofy Google Translate of Wiki): Kenmin Foods Co., Ltd. of Kobe is a rice noodle manufacturer that is best known for its “Welcome to the Kenmin Kingdom” ad campaign. Kenmin’s ads are known for their eerie content and surreal product image.

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Previous posts of Japan’s fun ads for very bent noodles include:

 



 

Privacy is back

dazzle-googlesThree years ago, in Anti‑surveillance chic from Japan (2013-01-29)
we covered these Invisibility Glasses″ of Professor Isao Echizen at Tokyo’s National Institute of Informatics. Well, the professor is back with better haircut and mega-funding from Nissey Corp.

n-glasses-privacy

For a mere ¥36,000 or about $331 USD, you can buy the new Privacy Visor″ Nissey Corp., Gort_Firing and you too can defeat the forces of evil with style with your own Gort Visor (Wiki).

 
Learn more about the new visor from the Nissey’s Press Release.

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Our previous reports on Japanese digital masking trends include:
   • Facial recognition for masked Japanese (3Yen / 2006-01-14)
   • Digital makeup, Japanese (3Yen / 2011-04-18)

 

 



 

VibeBar, the Wild One

Many times I think entertainment venues in Tokyo are just trolling us with click bait…

The VibeBar–Wild One (dildo bar) click to view.
wild-one-bar-video-screenshotbar-shot

Learn more at the official website that is is sort-of-bilingual at: vibebar.jp

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Previous “upstanding” reports with “good vibes” include::

 



 

FUKUYOU pawn!

A pawn shop ad seen on the back of bus in Kyoto Japan….

fukuyou-bust-bertrand Très smart ce nom

Google Translate of fukuyou78.com:
Please bring your precious metals, expensive brand goods, home appliances, antique musical instruments, etc. as pawn, or you can purchase them at the Fukuyou Pawn shops of Kyoto. We give the highest assessments, and offer the best prices.
fukuyou-store-front

 

Previous fuckqued reports include:

 



 

‘GET SURPRISE!’ — Tokyo Shinjuku Station’s ‘mystery touch’

get-surpise

eventDetail

Japanese news report of: matome.naver.jp (Google Translate):
The ‘mystery touch’ is part of a Puré Gummy campaign being held at Shinjuku Station from April 11 to 17.

mystery-touch
get-suprise-staff
Even in relatively vandalism-free Japan, it is going to take a large support staff →
to keep the ‘mystery touch’ from getting to be too much of a “GET SURPRISE!”

Learn more about the time and exact location of the event at the official Japanese website of Puré Gummy: kanro.co.jp/jurepure

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Our previous gummy/mouthy news includes:

 



 

Hot new Japanese TV commerical featuring a foreign male chauvinist pig

Hey, did you see the new Japanese TV commerical featuring me[1] as a foreign, big-snouted, male chauvinist pig?
I’m especially proud of my big kabe-don[2] scene where the young housewife working as an abused supermarket stock clerk eats me!
pig-lover_640x

Also check out the second commerial with the same “Iberian pig” (イベリコ豚) playing a foreign exercise instructor who gets eaten by a housewife.

south-park-pig
 
[1]
Ok, ok, the commerical does not star me. I look much more pig-like. I have a much more pink piggy complexion, I sport a bigger snout, and I am more sparsely bristled than the Japanese actor just pretending to be a foreign pig.

dream-of-kabedon
[2]
Kabe-don (壁ドン)—loosely meaning, “hitting a wall”—is a “romantic” way Japanese in manga/comics proclaim their affection (and is a form of Japanese sexual harrassment). You can learn more details about kabe-don at:
Kotaku.com: Manga trope appears–confuses some

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Our previous piggy reports include:

 



 


Japan hits Peak Lipstick

Not an April Fool’s story…

Japan Lipstick Industry Is Projected to Reach a Significant Height in Its Market Growth as the 2016 Consumer Demands Are Evolving
…a detailed analysis of this industry on the basis of the ongoing market trends, in addition to the market drivers, demand inhibitors, resource utilization, market challenges
SBWIRE — 04/01/2016 blah, blah, blah…

traditional-japanese-makeup-1 YVE-style.com/makeup/japanese-makeup-style: The above photo was labled “traditional” Japanese makeup, ha, ha.
 
pikachu pucker pokemon by viridis somnioOur previous lipstick reports include: