Japanese un-news of the year!

160px-Square_watermelonThe savior of lazy news reporter at deadline who is supposed to be covering Japan is a quick story is SQUARE WATERMELONS (Wiki).

Square watermelon shipments begin in western Japan city
Kyodo News | 2017-June-28
Square-shaped watermelon shipments began Wednesday in a western Japan city where the product has become widely known for its rarity and is attracting interest even from overseas.
The watermelons shipped from Zentsuji on Japan’s Shikoku main island are not edible and purchased generally as ornaments


A few of our many other reports of square watermelons include:

  • Square Watermelons ‘All the Rage’ in Japan (not) (news.3yen.com/2014-06-29/square-watermelons-all-the-rage-in-japan-not)
  • ‘Deko’ melons of Japan (news.3yen.com/2011-03-11/deko-melons-of-japan)
  • How do you like these melons? (news.3yen.com/2009-06-14/how-do-you-like-these-melons)
  • Godzilla Eggs < (news.3yen.com/2005-09-05/dynamite-vs-godzilla-eats)

    A horse in a pink Hello Kitty mask saves Japan


    Watch a horse in a pink Hello Kitty mask save Japan
    The Verge | July 29, 2016
    The Shining Star of Losers Everywhere from The All-Nighter Room on Vimeo.


    Saaaa, the rest-of-the-story is that the horse, Haru Urara, really didn’t “save” Japan’s economy, which has been in the dumper since the Lost Decade (that started in 1991 and has lasted until today).
    Still, this a gr-r-reat story and a multi-award winning film.

    Other “horsey” reports include:



    Japan is the best Communist nation

    “SovietSupreme,” a frequent contributor to news.3Yen.com writes:
    japan-communist-flag_4Greetings Comrades!
    We all should be gladdened by Japan’s striving to achieve the ultimate goal of the communist society—the common ownership of the means of production.

    The Tokyo Whale Is Quietly Buying Up Huge Stakes in Japan Inc
    bourgeois-Bloomberg | April 24, 2016
    They may not realize it yet, but Japan Inc.’s executives are increasingly working for a shareholder unlike any other: the nation’s money-printing central bank. While the Bank of Japan’s name is nowhere to be found in regulatory filings on major stock investors, the monetary authority’s exchange-traded fund purchases have made it a top 10 shareholder in about 90 percent of the Nikkei 225 Stock Average, according to estimates compiled by Bloomberg from public data. It’s now a major owner of more Japanese blue-chipsmore...


    Our previous reports Japan’s “Communist” success include:


    The Tokyo’s 2020 Monster has been slain!

    The ridiculously fraudulent $2 billion stadium for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics (3Yen 2015-07-12) has been slain, w0oT!

    Olympic stadium building plan back to drawing board: Abe
    TOKYO, 2015 July 17, 4pm | Kyodo
    Prime Minister Shinzo Abe said Friday he has decided to bring the current building plan for the Olympic stadium back to the drawing board amid public uproar over its soaring costs more...
    Screen Shot 2015-07-17 at 4.48.23 PM

    Previous 3Yen reports Japan’s preparation for the useless, waste-of-money, 2020 Olympics include:


    Japan Railways Kyushu to make stations staffless

    jrJapan Railways (JR) Kyushu operating in the most southwesterly of Japan’s four main islands is suffering from depopulation and stagnation, which has resulted in drastic economic measures such as…

    left_long quotebar 24x260pxJR Kyushu to make stations staffless
    The Tokyo Reporter | January 18, 2015 — JR Kyushu will by 2016 operate its 100 biggest stations without any staff. The company, which plans to go public next year, is looking for ways to cut costs and improve efficiency. The first 50 or so stations will go staffless this spring{big snip}So without staff, what happens to stations? One has solved the problem by making a goat stationmaster. Full story…

    yagi ekicho by breakingjp3


    Other “goaty” 3Yen posts include:
       • Monkeys and goats, oh my! (3Yen / 2014-09-30)
       • Robo-goat for Tokyo losers (3Yen / 2007-11-02/)
       • Sony’s Silence of the Goats (3Yen / 2007-04-29)
       • Goats. Sex. Harajuku Girls. (3Yen / 2006-12-02)



    The rise of cosplay = The fall of the economy

    An interest in cosplay should be a key no-no for any job prospect evaluation by human resources, as I have said countless times* here on the 3Yen.

    Why the rise of cosplay is a bad sign for the economy
    —Dressing up like Wolverine … is probably more fun than scouring the classifieds for menial jobs—
    The Week | October 9, 2014

    What Tokyo needs is MORE CONCRETE!

    Tokyo looks to start a chain reaction of MORE CONCRETE!

    Tokyo looks to start chain reaction of urban renewal
    Nikkei | 2014 Oct. 03
    The Japanese government will throw funding and tax relief behind a new approach to thinning out overcrowded residential areasmore

    The idea is that the Tokyo government will use idle municipal land to build fero-concrete apartment blocks to serve as new homes for people living in areas designated for redevelopment. Then the evil old homes will erased for new blocks of concrete cages for people.

    Previous posts on Japanese concrete love that I have covered on the 3Yen include:
       • Japan’s national tree–concrete utility pole (3Yen / 2011-01-14
       • 10 Ugly Rivers of the World (3Yen / 2010-02-05)
       • Japanese Junkspace (3Yen / 2008-06-29)
       • Ill-Machine, Tokyo (3Yen / 2008-01-22)
    concrete-viewing tokyo

    Japan’s best economic solution

    Finally, here’s a solution to Japan’s laid-back/moribund economy*

    Japanese wartime slogan:

    "Lower living standards,
                     raise the flag!"


    MT @ThinkSmart2011 @masafumi_yoshi: 今日の安倍政権を見ているようだ pic.twitter.com/TcNaovlpnL— Anthony Davis (@ozAntinnippon) September 3, 2014

    Japan’s newest look! Team ‘3rd Arrow’


    With today’s loss at the World Cup (3Yen / 2014-06-25), Japan’s “Samurai Blue” team (above) is changing its name to said-open3rd Arrowsaid-closed after Prime Minister Abe’s “Japan Revitalization Strategy”


    Read more about PM Abe’s disastrous said-openThree Arrowssaid-closed at Documents | Prime Minister of Japan and His Cabinet: Overview of “Japan Revitalization Strategy” for New Growth .

    Japan’s ‘Great Wall’

    The Great Wall of Japan is yet another dubious plan to concrete over much of the country’s coast for the LOVE OF CONCRETE, grrr.

    The Great Wall of Japan
    —Tsunami protection–or a boondoggle for builders?—

    The Economist.com | 2014 June 14
    Three years ago, an earthquake under the Pacific Ocean triggered towering waves that carried away over 18,000 people and caused a meltdown at the Fukushima Dai-ichi power station…
    …Japan’s government wasted little time announcing a favourite solution: pouring concrete. A few months after the disaster it pledged to build hundreds of seawalls and breakers in the three worst-hit prefectures of Fukushima, Miyagi and Iwate. The total cost will be up to ¥1 trillion ($9.8 billion). More walls are planned. A report by the ministries of agriculture and land said 14,000km of Japan’s 35,000km coastline requires tsunami protection.
    Seawalls are controversial. They look hideous and the evidence for their effectiveness is flimsy…in the city of Kamaishi a $1.6 billion breakwater, listed in the “Guinness Book of Records” as the world’s largest, crumbled on impact. Nearly 90% of existing seawalls along the northeast coast suffered a similar fate. Critics say they even resulted in greater damage being caused elsewhere. “There is simply no guarantee that seawalls will stop every single tsunami,” says Nobuo Shuto, an engineer at Tohoku University.


    Environmentalists, surfers, and anybody sane hates these concrete seawalls and tetrapods because over time they cause all the sand on beaches destroying the beach habitat creating a concrete dead zone. The Japanese fishing industry is so stupid they don’t realize that by destroying the beach/coastal habitat they are further reducing the number of fish in their already over-fished waters, arrrg.

    Previous 3Yen reports (since 2006) on this concrete problem include: