In celebration of its “Golden Week” national holiday (3Yen / 2006-05-04), Japan has decided to re-start (japandailypress.com / 2013-03-24) all its unrepaired and failing nuclear reactors…

—LDP Renames Golden Week As “Cesium Week” In Honor Of July Reactor Restarts — @DailyGomiuri (@DailyGomiuri) April 28, 2013

Kyødø FauxNews / 2013Apr04
Tajima Motor Corporation, a maker of racing cars, unveils in Shizuoka, central Japan, a prototype shelter made of fiber-reinforced plastic that can accommodate up to twenty people in the event of a space storms (or earthquake-tsunami).
—via Floating tsunami shelter | Kyødø News | Photograghs
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On the official website of Tajima Motor Corporation (goofy Google Translate) we can learn that inside of the rescue “SAFE+” shuttlecraft is equipped with the all-important karaoke disaster countermeasures.

Caption: Shizuoka Prefectural Governor, Heita Kawakatsu and Soichiro Fukutake, president of Benesse Corp., test drive prototype No. 1 of the SAFE+ rescuecraft.
Covering the news of the sumo world yesterday, a charming Fuji TV newscaster makes a small point… and then realizes it.

Embiggen the small point to 640×360 px.
To enjoy the best in Kitchen Design Norwich Buttseks.
By now, my wang was shriveling like a slug in a salt mine. The seemingly never-ending streams of Aunt Jemima Pancake batter soon had me coated like a plasterer’s radio. I can’t wait to devour the batter from wet spot on my mammy’s flowered fanny. With my long, chromed whisk, I thrusted deep into Jemima’s crusting trench made her quiver like an earthquake in a reclaimed land next to Tokyo Bay.

Their quiver is as an open sepulchre, they are all mighty mmmm…
Shizuoka police have released this security camera image to the public asking for their help in identifying the robber.
Obviously, it’s Hibagon*, Japan’s Bigfoot.
Image released of the robbing of a convenience store in Shizuoka
Shizuoka Shimbun 2013/3/14
(giga-goofy Google Translate)
In the early morning hours of March 13th, the Family Mart convenience store in Miho Shimizu-ku, Shizuoka was robbed. The robber took 103,000 yen ($1,092 USD) in cash. Now, the Shimizu police have released to the public an image from the store’s security cameras of the robber.
According to the police, the robber was 175 cm (5′10″) tall and hiding his appearance with a facial covering. He was wearing and black jacket and trousers, gloves, and had a small knife, such as a fruit knife.
Police have interviewed the clerk of the convenience store and nearby residents, and they are now investigating how the robbery was performed and the robber’s escape route.
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*Learn more about Japan’s Bigfoot/Yeti/Sasquatch, the Hibagon, at cryptomundo.com and Wikipedia.

Toshinori Muto of Japan quickly tees off before the dread Sand Cthulhu has His Evil Way with the hapless Japanese golfer.

Rest-of-the-story…
—On the first day of the New Zealand PGA Championship Toshinori Muto of Japan tees off at The Hills Golf Club in Queenstown on Feb. 28th, 2013. The Otago Daily Times reported that Muto (34) said,
the views at The Hills are completely alien to Japanese-based golfers
(Otago Daily Times Online News | March 1, 2013).
Right now in the last throes of winter, the air in Japan is extremely dry if you get my “drift.”

Click to view the original non-parody poster.
Check out the 3Yen’s many other non-dandruff related train manners posters for the Tokyo Metro here.
When the Tokyo subway cars are running at their daily 200% of capacity*, please line up and wait your turn to get kicked in the head.
View the original poster above for January 2013 at the Tokyo Metro Manners Foundation.
..
Daily Mail | 19 November 2012: Photos reveal squashed Tokyo subway commuters squeezed on to trains
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*Business Insider | Jan. 11, 2012: Take A Look At Why The Tokyo Metro Is Known As 'Commuter Hell'
Realizing there is a gaping gap in Glico’s Pocky lineup*, Japan is obviously stockpiling for the introduction of plutonium-flavored Pocky!
Yummy!
Fair Use — Parody
Japan sticks to plan for extracting plutonium, but has little use for the tons it already has
Washington Post (AP News) December 28, 2012
…a high-tech facility that would convert spent fuel into a plutonium-uranium mix designed for the next generation of reactors… supposed to provide fuel while minimizing nuclear waste storage problems. Those ambitions are falling apart because years of attempts to build a “fast breeder” reactor, which would use the reprocessed fuel, appear to be ending in failure…more…
Previous posts on the 3Yen about other exciting and creative Pocky offerings include:
• Get POCKYed! (3Yen / 2011-11-12)
• Japanese ’schoolgirls’ want you to take a pokey
(3Yen / 2010-02-15)
• All Pockyed-up on Valentines Deay (3Yen / 2010-02-05)
..
~DailyGomiuri, on Twitter
The truth is the government really does just Photoshop new heads on the official Japan Cabinet portraits since Prime Minister changes every year and while in office the Prime Minister shuffles his cabinet at least three times.
