Santa sex with a shark…in Japan of course

…Santa Claus…embraces a Zebra shark as he* swims with fish inside the Sunshine International Aquarium in Tokyo
Gawker / 2013dec11


*Note that the Santa who is embracing the shark is a female staff member (3Yen / 2007-12-17) of Sunshine Aquarium wearing heavy waterproof makeup.
She is cross-dressing as Santa Claus in the true spirit of Japanese Christmas (3Yen / 2013-12-05) as you can see in the close-ups of her.

girl santa japan underwater

Japanese tentacle sex spreads across the world!

The evil grip of Japanese tentacle sex* (3Yen 2006-04-13) is reaching across the world and is appearing in the oddest places…


You can learn more details about the National Reconnaissance Office’s new tentacle-sex* logo (L) at:
NROL-39 Logo Nothing Beyond Our Reach   Business Insider (Dec. 7, 2013)

Steven-Seagal dead in murder suicide!

A Steven Seagal, who has a reputation as an extremely angry guy at times, has been found dead in what the police are calling a “murder suicide.” Luckily…
                  …the perp of the murder suicide is not Japan’s homeboy bubba buddha, Steven Seagal, but some other angry guy.

Pair’s deaths a murder suicide
The Detroit News | 2013sep29
Police said Sunday two people found shot to death inside a Wixom apartment Thursday died in a murder suicide and domestic dispute.
Steven-Seagal Quang Ly, 40, and the 25-year-old–manwere found inside the Stone Ridge Apartments complex near Pontiac Trail and Beck roads Thursday morning
Steven-Seagal Ly is a nationalized citizen who had a reputation as an “extremely angry guy at times.”


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Japan’s season for coolies

M. O. wrote:
Given the history of the term*, it’s kinda interesting to see it here in Japan…


Well, they did show some sensitivity by spelling coolie* incorrectly.

COOLly does it all!


From the top left, the instructive graphic above reads:

   “DRY,” full of purple polka dots, anti-cooties, “SOFTo,”
   “COOL,” radioactive, stretchy, sniffs your armpits,
   silver infused, full of dead fish, foreigner friendly, and blocks UV rays.


* Coolie 苦 力 (pinyin: kǔlì)
In 1727 Dr. Engelbert Kämpfer described “coolies” as dock laborers who would unload Dutch merchant ships at Nagasaki in Japan...more…

Finally, Japan invents a *useful* robot, Part 2

Long-time contributor to the 3Yen, MARKed TRAIL, just sent us this hot robotics tip…

Here’s a continuation of your story, said-openFinally, Japan invents a *useful* robot (3Yen / 2013-02-15).said-closed

What MARKed TRAIL is refering to is the cruel joke that ALL of Japan’s robots failed to help in the nuke plant meltdown (3Yen / 2011-04-05). That is, Japan has spent trillions of both corporate and public money on robot development, but did no have any robots capable of helping in the aftermath of the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear disaster*.

Previous posts about Japan’s continued efforts in making useless wanking robots include:
japanese wanking-bots animated
   • Japan’s useless anthropomorphic robots
3Yen / 2010-10-15
   • 3Yen quoted by BBC & The Independent
3Yen / 2010-07-17
   • Wanking automation
3Yen / 2007-08-01 | See right. ↗

Monsterous alien slugs invade Japan!!

Den4, the 3Yen’s correspondent-at-large warns of Alien Slugs!
Where’s Gojira or Ultraman to save the day?

slug on diet bldg japan
Creative Commons photo credit to the flickr galleries of rhonddawildlifediary and Dick Johnson.

Giant alien slug invades Japan… again 2013/06/27
Japan is currently under threat by Limax Maximus: a giant slug with a distinctive leopard-print skincan be found increasing at an alarming rate.
As Japanese netizens read the headline, almost unanimously, comments of “It’s Eleking!” echoed like the horrific memories of the nation’s previous encounters with alien slugsAlthough, Ultraman had defeated Elekingit returned several timesmore…

Eleking (Wiki) is, of course, a space kaiju/monster from the Japanese TV series, Ultra Seven, and who then reappeared in the series Ultraman Taro ← (Hey, “Taro” is my name!).

Stargate suddenly opens in Japan!

Japan’s feverish work over years on its independent Stargate Project has resulted in success!

nagoshi-no-Harae 夏越の祓 at Imamiya-jinja 今宮神社 japanese stargate kyoto 2013
to the original, full-sized photo on @KyotoDailyPhoto Twitpic

Imamiya Shrine in Kyoto, like many shrines throughout Japan, has erected a great ring of miscanthus reeds for the “Nagoshi no harae”–Summer Purification Ceremonymore...

Previous 3Yen reports on the Japanese Stargate program include:
Stargate suddenly opens in Kyoto Japan! (3Yen | 2012-06-29
Japanese Stargate mysteriously appears (3Yen | 2005-03-18)
Stargate Mt Fuji (3Yen | 2008-07-02)
Schoolgirl contemplates the Stargate (3Yen | 2009-06-20)
Japan’s Stargate survives Earth’s Pole Shift! (3Yen | 2011-04-08)

Japan plans to restart its unrepaired nuclear reactors to celebrate ‘Cesium Week’

In celebration of its “Golden Week” national holiday (3Yen / 2006-05-04), Japan has decided to re-start ( / 2013-03-24) all its unrepaired and failing nuclear reactors
renaming japan golden week on twitter

LDP Renames Golden Week As “Cesium Week” In Honor Of July Reactor Restarts — @DailyGomiuri (@DailyGomiuri) April 28, 2013


Japan’s newest Shuttlecraft launched!

Kyødø FauxNews / 2013Apr04
Tajima Motor Corporation, a maker of racing cars, unveils in Shizuoka, central Japan, a prototype shelter made of fiber-reinforced plastic that can accommodate up to twenty people in the event of a space storms (or earthquake-tsunami).

—via Floating tsunami shelter | Kyødø News | Photograghs

On the official website of Tajima Motor Corporation (goofy Google Translate) we can learn that inside of the rescue “SAFE+” shuttlecraft is equipped with the all-important karaoke disaster countermeasures.

Shizuoka Prefectural Governor, Heita Kawakatsu and Soichiro Fukutake, president of Benesse Corp., test drive prototype No. 1 of the SAFE+ rescuecraft.