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Archive for the 'Faux news flash' Category

12/21/2012

Has THE END happened?

2012 dec 21 end of the world
The End of Japan (the rest of world is inconsequential) is foretold in the 12th Tzolkin of the Mayan Calendar. The prophecy IS coming true today, December 21st!
skeptic.com/reading_room/2012-and-counting

End-of-Tokyo_350x
images

Blessed be friend. WE light workers are here to guide you and expell the evil forces of demonic entities that inhabit the 4th realm. You are focused on the material manifestation of what may be. Doing is not the answer, you must be and accept the light. The Light fears not man but man can see the Light is real and that is rael-ian. Nibiru is not only a planet we can SEE NOW but a place inside our hearts a passage we open in our minds every 12,500 years. The ancients knew this…


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12/11/2012

“Grobaru wahmingu’ from Japanese Tentacle Santa

Let’s grobaru wahmingu! —That is, ‘Let’s global warming’ in mangled into semi-Japanese Katakana pronunciation as reported by the 3Yen’s correspondent-at-large, Den4.
In the exclusive photo below shows Japanese Tentacle Sex* Santa —one of The Deep Ones— giving Cthulhu a perfect Chaos-mas gift of a Global Warmer. (~_^)


grobaru wahmingu global warmer gift warming japanese tentacle santa


squid-mas tree snow glitteried
For more tentacle Christmas fun in Japan, refer to the previous 3Yen posts…
   • Monster/kaiju Christmas cumguts (3Yen / 2008-12-05)
   • Kaiju ‘Deck the Halls…’ (3Yen / 2010-12-08)
   • Spinning Squid Christmas Tree (3Yen / 2008-12-06 — See right.)

Posted by Taro in Faux news flash | 5 Comments »

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11/29/2012

Kaiju Emergency Alert!

Breaking news:
KAIJU/monster ATTACK!
Hack director Del Taco* is remaking the movie Cloverfield.

That is, to hype his upcoming movie “Pacific Rim (IMDb.com),” director Guillermo del Toro has released the following faux-CNN reports about a massive kaiju attack on San Francisco.


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11/27/2012

Best Korea’s secret Santa gift for Japan!

north korean flag waving
Best Korea can no longer tolerate the military conspiracy of the U.S./Japan Axis using the shameful excuse of “Santa” to violate sacred borders and airspace of the great nation, Choson Minjujuui Inmin KonghwagukNorth-Korea—The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea.

sat-pictures-best-korea
Satellite image shows activity at North Korea launch site
CNN.com | November 26th, 2012
….
a new launch could be possible in the next few weeks, according to the satellite imagery company DigitalGlobe…The image at North Korea's Sohae satellite launch station was taken on November 23 and shows similar preparations as was witnessed ahead of the failed April 13 attempt more...

taepodong rain north korean missile

For over 50 years NORAD has tracked this so-called “Santa Klaus” but they have failed to take countermeasures because he is actually an agent of evil hegemony.

This year Best Korea will put a stop to these bellicose incursions of the glorious airspace of Choson, once and for all.
look-out-Santa
(In case you were wondering what my real interest is in all of this that I have a real fondness for these North Korean “tests.” While I was on vacation in Tohoku in north of Japan back in August 1998, “Best Korea” shot a missile that passed overhead and missed landing in Japan by only 150km.)


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11/1/2012

The Tokyo Metro’s alien trash problem

This month’s faux train manners poster for the Tokyo Metro, hee, hee…
gaijin trash tokyo metro train manners poster
Click to view the original.


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10/19/2012

16th of October Isle Incident, Japan

As the drama continues to heat up as China clashes with the Japan over ownership of bird poop covered rocks in the East China Sea*, Japanese naval boatsforces give chase around Mifune Island on October 16, 2012 in Kiho, Mie Prefecture, Japan
WindowOnTheWorld | 17 October 2012 | DailyMailMetro
japanese navy defends island..

Ok, ok, read the real rest-of-the-story here.

Posted by Taro in Faux news flash | 5 Comments »

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9/1/2012

‘Getting off’ on Tokyo trains

Don’t you just hate it when you’re on the subway train and cannot “get off.”

metro manners in japanese
The above is the September edition of the Tokyo Metro Train Manners‘ poster series.
You can directly view the original, “unimproved” poster here at the Metro website.


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8/30/2012

New ‘nano nano’ and ’super mini’ mobiles spotted in Japan

The U.S. District Court’s verdict of August 24, against Samsung’s patent infringements on Apple’s iPhone has resulted in some good in terms of new designs. Today’s Japanese edition of the WWNews (Google Translate) reports that two new products that will be released this fall: Apple’s new “iPhone nano nano” and Samsung’s completing “GALAXY super mini” as shown below.

ipod nano vs samsung mini
WWNews | 2012-Aug-28

The WWNews went on to explain that at 0.8g the Apple’s “iPhone nano” is lighter than a 1 yen coin and a special bamboo toothpick (produced in Kyoto) is included for pressing the phone’s icons that are about 3mm square. However, the Samsung “GALAXY super mini” seems to have infringed Apple’s patent on the toothpick and Samsung use of a wooden stick with the GALAXY’s interface is likely to be disputed in court, ha, ha.


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8/15/2012

Emergent trouble in Japan

The 3Yen’s correspondent-at-large, Den4, sent in this report of his worries that Japan’s nuclear disaster has caused the vengeful Deep Ones* to emerge…

deep-ones-emerge_email-head
deep-ones-fish-head

Actually, the heat of the Dog Days of August is going to Japanese folks heads—The original photo (Left) and art (Right) was from the Japanese livedoor.blog of “hamusoku”.


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8/12/2012

Godzilla invades the Olympics!

uk critical level defoncon 1
 
The Olympics have gone to the CRITICAL LEVEL threat according to this exclusive report by Den4, the 3Yen’s correspondant-at-large.

den4 writes:
Timing was right…pretty bad Gojira, tho….

Posted by Taro in Faux news flash, Sports | 2 Comments »

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