Japanese un-news of the year!

160px-Square_watermelonThe savior of lazy news reporter at deadline who is supposed to be covering Japan is a quick story is SQUARE WATERMELONS (Wiki).

 
Square watermelon shipments begin in western Japan city
Kyodo News | 2017-June-28
Square-shaped watermelon shipments began Wednesday in a western Japan city where the product has become widely known for its rarity and is attracting interest even from overseas.
The watermelons shipped from Zentsuji on Japan’s Shikoku main island are not edible and purchased generally as ornaments
square-melons-girl-modest

 

 
A few of our many other reports of square watermelons include:

  • Square Watermelons ‘All the Rage’ in Japan (not) (news.3yen.com/2014-06-29/square-watermelons-all-the-rage-in-japan-not)
  • ‘Deko’ melons of Japan (news.3yen.com/2011-03-11/deko-melons-of-japan)
  • How do you like these melons? (news.3yen.com/2009-06-14/how-do-you-like-these-melons)
  • Godzilla Eggs < (news.3yen.com/2005-09-05/dynamite-vs-godzilla-eats)
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    ♬~Beginning to look like ‘Kurisumasu’

    Meri Kurisumasu (メリークリスマス) aka XXX Merry Christmas from the love-Hotel Chapel Christmas

    View post on imgur.com

    According to DingisMcGee’s youtube, ‵‵Hotel Chapel Christmas near Narita International Airport is where Santa takes his ‘Hoe Hoe Hoe’ in Japan.″

    Hotel Chapel Christmas says it’s, ‵‵Designed for adults only…guests can unwind and relax in the spacious [Christmassy] environment

    _______________________
    Our previous Christmassy reports of Japan include:

     






    Pearl Harbor Day from the curent Japanese perspective

    Today is Pearl Harbor Day* from the current Japanese perspective (Wiki).

    pearl-harbor-day

    このイラストが大好きで — 部屋に飾っています(*^^*) — スギモトカステン (@kuromedakaf14) 2016-03-16

     

    Previous “Pearly” posts on the topic of December 7th include:

     



     

    Merry Christmasween!

    Happy Hallowmas? Merry Christmasween?

    Here’s a fun Japanese cultural fusion of Halloween ghosts with Charlie Brown’s favorite Christmas tree.

    Merry-Christmasween

    ;

    Our previous reports of Japanese mixups with holidays include:

     



     

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    Merry Christmas Wieners!
    pic_item_20

    wiener^party

    Eyes are watching you

    In the 1960s, Japan’s “Camera Magazine” published photos these ophthalmologist eyes signboards…

    eye-of-screw-tainam 60年代には日本のカメラ雑誌でも写真が掲載されていたらしいから、そこで見たのかな? (Google Translate) http://cyberisland.teldap.tw/graphyer/photo/…

     
    The photo was taken by the Taiwanese photographer Wang Shuangqua/王双全” (1920-1978) but it became
    screw← the eye of the Japanese manga Nejishiki (“Screw”) and then underwent various iterations such as…

    parody絵のお仕事まだまだ募集しております⊂((・x・))⊃! pic.twitter.com/HYZlFMvJeJ— ぢぬすな子 (@dinusuna) March 19, 2016

     
    Also notice that on these billboards the asian eyelashes are correctly represented as really short (3Yen / 2015-02-18). eyes^2

     
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    A few of our many previous eyeball reports include:

     



     

    Japanese winter solstice <yawn>

    Today is the Winter Solstice—called “ Touji“—the 22nd of December*, which is the shortest day and the longest night of the year.

    And, what do you do on the winter solstice in Japan?

    Obviously, get naked and bathe in yuzu-oranges with Japan’s most annoying video-blogger…

    Learn all the <yawn> cultural </yawn> details on Touji/冬至 at: iromegane.com/…22nd-of-december-is-touji-in-japan



    Rockin’ Godzilla and friends

    Godzilla and friends know how to liven up any party…

     
    gozilla-rocksmadeline Back to the things I love. Rocking out with my friends… —Madeline (@emadelineroy) Nov. 28, 2015

     

     

    A few of the many previous party-Godzilla reports on the 3Yen include:

     


    ‘Weird’ Japan vs ‘Normal’ Japan

    People who live in Japan groan (actually Japanese suck air through their teeth rather than groan) about the lame observation that, “Japan is weird.”
    People are weird.
    In that context, the so-called [ab]normal-day-in-Japan photos below actually are quite normal.

     
     Best_Personal_mag_sushi_header_320x100
      What does a normal day in Japan look like?
      Turning Japanese blog by Andrew C | 2015/July1-6_normal-japan
      7-12_normal-japan
      13-15_normal-Japan View the full-sized photos on the turningjapanese.org

     
    Most of the above photos are just a normal-day-in-Japan, if you understand that they are intentionally meant to be strange for advertising and artistic reasons.
    Specifically (with links to previous 3Yen posts of the original photos):

    • Photos 1 and 2 are just unusual but “normal” enough enough product adversing displays.
    • Photo 3 is Chinese (with Chinese writing on the Coke bottle hats).
    • Photo 4 of a lady walking her pig is rare but possible—I see the Chicken-on-his-head Man and the Live-Goldfish-Earrings Man most weekends.
    • Photo 5 is abnormal.
    • Photo 6 is “normal” everyday occurrence in Chiba (just east of Tokyo) were “Batman” commutes. (3Yen / 2015-01-12)
    • Photo 7 is a movie promotion but Japan has several “normal” permanent mecha statues. (3Yen / 2010-06-03)
    • Photo 8 is a “normal” cosplay contest (3Yen / 2007-11-30).
    • Photo 9 is a “normal” performance artist, Omaru Uwabaki, who performs every weekend in Machida. (3Yen / 2011-01-27)
    • Photo 10 is a “normal” summer promo display–KFC Japan dresses the Colonel for Xmas, Halloween, etc. as well as giving him a sex change occasionally. (3Yen / 2010-09-09)
    • Photo 11 is a “normal” failed product test–Japanese think pancakes are a dessert (cakes).
    • Photo 12 is a “normal” mainstream science museum exhibit, which runs every school summer vacation period. The Japanese (like Germans) love everything poop related. (3Yen / 2014-07-08)
    • Photo 13 is a “normal” attention-seeking, performance artist. (Rocketnews24 2014/02/22)
    • Photo 14 is a “normal” Coca Cola advertising promotion that ran for a couple a weeks a few years ago. Refer to:
         Coke machine robo-babe (3Yen 2007-09-2)
    • Photo 15 is a “normal” Mario Go-kart rental business for tourists–an everyday sight in Tokyo. (kotaku.com)

    So to recap the fun, five photos are just advertising promotions, two are of performance artists, one is Chinese not Japanese, and only one is “abnormal.”
     



    Fake sunken pillboxes under Japan’s coast

    Since today is Loser Day—August 15, 1945—Japan’s day of surrender of WWII, I’ll present this bit of fake post war trivia…

    left_quoter_14x24Sunken Pillboxes Guarded Jap Coast right_quoter_13x24
    Modern Mechanix magazine / March, 1947

    Japanese Hat Parasol

    Now that Japan’s horrid, torrid Dog Days* are full force, I’ll present…

    sidebar-quote long Japanese Hat Parasol in Place with Ribbed Edge Extending Well over Wearer’s Shoulders
    Hat-Parasol-Japanesevia Mostly Forbidden Zone (tumblr)

    Rest-of-the-story…