DUCK!↯
☢ Cuckoo Kim and his crew in Best Korea are sending Japan its Christmas presents early …
SEOUL/TOKYO, Dec. 12, 2012 (Reuters) – Isolated and impoverished North Korea launched its second long-range rocket of 2012 on Wednesday … just before 10 a.m. Korean time (0100 GMT) and overflew the Japanese island of Okinawa...more...
Marked in bright red on the map (L) is a huge radioactive Dead Zone around the Fukushima nuclear power plant meltdown with a pink corridor going right through the middle of it marked with the charming Japanese euphemism, ”difficult area.” In this special area, entry is allowed in magical circumstances when it is for the public’s convenience. That is, “convenience” for the public makes deadly radiation somehow go way, ha, ha.
More revisions to Fukushima zones
world-nuclear-news.org
03 December 2012
…the zone is changed to allow restricted access to residents, although they may not stay overnight. Some parts of the zone have now been declared a “restricted” area where entry can only be gained for a specific purpose, marked orange on METI's map. Remaining parts of the zone are now classed as a “difficult” area…more…
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—0KUMA, JAPAN - DECEMBER 07: W0rkers set the gate to divide the area on December 7, 2012 in Okuma, Fukushima, Japan. Japanese government reclassified the area where 96 percent of Okuma city residents used to live as 'residents will face difficulties in returning for a long time' according to the radiation contamination level, will apply on December 10.
Breaking news:
KAIJU/monster ATTACK!
Hack director Del Taco* is remaking the movie Cloverfield.
That is, to hype his upcoming movie “Pacific Rim (IMDb.com),” director Guillermo del Toro has released the following faux-CNN reports about a massive kaiju attack on San Francisco.
In a disastrous debut, Japan Inc’s newest AT-AT Walker (Wiki) fails spectacularly.
Toshiba Shows Four-Legged Robot for Nuke Disaster
ABC News | by Yuri Kageyyama AP Business Writer
Nov. 21, 2012 (AP) YOKOHAMA–Toshiba Corp. unveiled a robot Wednesday that the company says can withstand high radiation and help…[at] Japan’s crippled Fukushima Dai-ichi nuclear plant.
The four-legged robot can climb over debris and venture into radiated areas off-limits to humans…But the machine, which looks like an ice cooler on wobbly metal legs, also appears prone to glitches. The robot took a jerky misstep during a demonstration to reporters, freezing with one leg up in the air. It had to be lifted by several people and rebooted.…more...
Previous 3Yen reports of Japan’s robotic failures at the time of its greatest need include:
• More Japanese robot wankering (3Yen / 2012-09-28)
• Japanese robot ‘misuse’ (3Yen / 2012-02-19)
• Japanese Fembot Bar (3Yen / 2012-07-28)
• Japan’s govn’t to build fun Gundams! (3Yen / 2012-06-27)
Here in Japan, we’re continually getting fun reports of radioactive bears (3Yen / 2012-11-11) and massive convergences of nuclear jellyfish (3Yen / 2012-10-27). And now there’s this…
Cesium in trout 110 times over limit
The Japan Times | Nov. 18, 2012
A mountain trout caught in the Niida River in Fukushima Prefecture contained 11,400 becquerels of radioactive cesium per kilogram, more than 110 times above the government limit for food products, a survey by the Environment Ministry …more…
Other fishy Fukushima news of the nuclear reactor meltdowns reported on the the 3Yen include:
☢ No-so-green Greenlings of Fukushima
(3Yen / 2012-08-22)
☢ Big ‘n’ radioactive — Japanese sea life moves onto land!
(3Yen / 2011-07-26)
☢ Japan’s radioactive sushi & seas
(3Yen / 2011-05-27)
Glow-in-the-dark, asiatic black bears (R) roaming the dead zone around the Fukushima nuclear meltdown is like a mash-up of The Colbert Report’s campaign against those “Godless Killing Machines” pillaging our peaceful planet.
Japan’s Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare now reports that this Ursine Evil has SEVEN times the Japanese limit: 100 becquerels of radiation per kilogram (100 Bq/Kg*).
760 Bq/Kg of cesium from Asian black bear in west coast of Japan
Fukushima Diary | November 9, 2012
According to the report of Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare, 760 Bq/Kg of cesium was measured from Asian black bear in Niigata prefecture…
Sample : Meat of Asian black bear
Sampling date : 10/24/2012
Cs-134 : 280 Bq/Kg
Cs-137 : 480 Bq/Kg
Location : Tokamachi city Niigata
More…
Read about it for yourself in the report of Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare on page 28 (PDF in Japanese)…
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Earlier warnings of the threat of Japanese bears on the 3Yen include:
• Care-giving Robot Bears! (3Yen / 2011-08-03)
• Garbage bears plague downtown Tokyo! 3Yen / 2010-11-25
• Collected boxes ‘with children’ for hungry bears
↙(3Yen / 2011-01-16)
Only-in-Japan laments the 3Yen’s correspondent-at large, Den4. Japan serves up plenty of biohazard burgers (3Yen / 2007-02-24) but this Cesium hamburger steak is waaay too much fun not to report.
Curry Hamburger: Delicious! Nutritious!! Contains Cesium!!! Our Brave Reporter Investigates
RocketNews24 | 2012/11/06
…The proprietor of the restaurant explained…
“The beef patties really do contain traces of cesium. Since the amount of the substance in the meat is well below the ‘safe’ amount determined by the government, we technically don’t have to mention that there’s any in there…so, even though they’re perfectly safe to eat, we decided to make it plain–these hamburgers contain cesium.”
More…
Other Japanese burger “surprises” include:
• Pumpkin Bumpkin Burger (3Yen / 2012-10-20)
• Cheez-whiz fondue chicken burger? (3Yen / 2010-10-05)
• Biohazard alert–’Choco Burger’! (3Yen / 2010-09-16)
• Pastafarain noodle burgers (3Yen / 2007-05-22)
Angry packs of jellyfish attacking and blocking the intake of the cooling seawater supply on a nuclear power plant (3Yen / 2011-06-25) are now Japan’s latest catastrophic concern of Japan’s nuclear industry…
Possible catastrophic nuclear scenarios reviewed
NHK WORLD English | /2012oct26
…[the Japanese government] will study various types of serious accidents or dangers. These will include terrorist attacks, plane crashes, volcanic activity, toxic gases and the loss of cooling functions due to a massive convergence of jellyfish from the sea...more...
Previous 3Yen reports over the years about these mad jellies include:
—PANIC! Killer jellyfish invading Japan! 2008-02-09
—INVASION OF THE NUCLEAR JELLYFISH! 2006-07-20
—The Attack of the Killer Jellyfish! 2007-02-20
—Attack of the giant jellyfish! 2005-12-08
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It has been more than a year since we reported on Japan’s radioactive sushi and seas (3Yen / 2011-05-27), but nothing has improved.
Fish Caught in Fukushima as Tainted as a Year Ago, Study Says
Bloomberg | Oct 26, 2012
Fish caught in waters off the coast of northern Japan, where an earthquake triggered a radiation leak at the Fukushima power plant, are still as contaminated today…Contamination levels were particularly high among species dwelling at the bottom of the ocean, as sinking radioactive materials tainted the seafood, research…in the journal Science, suggest there is a continued source of radiation from the seafloor that will have a lasting impact…more…
The real shame is that Japanese waters have been criminally overfished for decades. And, now the seas continue to be contaminated by the FukushimaFuckup©, so why the flying-flounder fool with fishing in the area at all?
Now is the time, not to rebuild the fishing industry, but to use this as a chance to reduce the total number of Japanese fishing boats and let fishstocks rebuild.
Back March, the 3Yen reported on the Japan’s “creative” solution of Feeding radioactive rice to the elderly (3Yen / 2012-03-26).
Well now, the Japanese government is reluctantly admitting that rice from the greater Fukushima area outside the official 20km nuclear meltdown zone can’t pass the government’s contamination standards. 
Fukushima rice above threshold for cesium
The Japan Times | Oct. 25, 2012
FUKUSHIMA — Rice grown by a farmer in Sukagawa, Fukushima Prefecture, returned a radioactive cesium reading of 110 becquerels per kilogram, exceeding the maximum of 100, the prefectural government announced…more...
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