Heil mein Führer Abe!

defaced-abeTokyo cops arrest man for adding Hitler moustaches to Abe posters
Tokyo Reporter | 2015-Sep-27
Tokyo Metropolitan Police on Friday announced the arrest of a 71-year-old manTakeshi Muto is alleged to have used an oil-based pen to draw a narrow moustache, very similar to that made famous by Adolf Hitler, on an image of Abe appearing on a poster hanging on a fence inside a parking lot inMachida City


The elderly vandal admitted to police his guilt saying that, in considering the current government, it was unavoidable.″
The rest-of-the-story is that Japan’s current Prime Minister, Shinzo Abe, has undemocratically rammed through changes to the Japanese Constitution in the past weeks and supports “revisionist” histories of WWII in school textbooks and the press (the Japanese equivalent of Holocaust denying).


Previous 3Yen reports about the already conservative Japan’s shift to right-wing extremism on the include:


Toyochy triptych interment?

toyocky kime mascot
Remember Toyochy, Toyohashi City’s mascot—a fabulous fembot with bodacious bubble butt*?

When a Toyochy dies, a Toyohashi trash truck quickly has to haul off the old bot to the scrapyard. The city must replace the robot swiftly since its body fades from smoothly-rounded red contours to an ugly lumpy and peeling gray-pink exterior.

–Triptych of Toyochy’s interment–
the robot’s lugubrious last rites
toyocky triptych funeral


Toyochy and other Japanese mega-dorky mascots previously covered on the 3Yen include:


Softbank Japan’s contractual obligations for ROBO-SEX

Since Softbank “Pepper” robot costs* 198,000 yen ($1,654 USD) to purchase and then the owner has to then pay another 24,600 yen ($206 USD) per month for the service contract, the bitchin’ bot better do a lot more than just, “shaking its hips and moan.”


No sex please, we’re robots!
Buyers of hit new ‘emotional robot’ Pepper to sign contract vowing it won’t be used for sex

DAILY MAIL | 22 September 2015
Japan-based SoftBank included a clause in the ownership contract which said using the robot for ‘the purpose of sexual or indecent behavior’ breaks this rental agreement…Computer pranksters have already reprogrammed the iPad hanging from its neck to give Pepper ‘virtual breasts’ which makes it shake its hips and moan when touched..more


Previously the 3Yen has reported on Japanese robosex including:


Japan’s Gamera has invaded North Korea !

Gamera-comic Japan’s kaiju, Gamera, The Invincible, Super Monster, Guardian of the Universe, and Friend of All Children (Wiki) has been seen invading North Korea!


North Korean zoo upgrades include 65-meter ‘turtle’
NK News – North Korea News / 2015 Sept. 21
Upgrades to Pyongyang’s Central Zoo include construction of a 65-meter turtle-shaped building, and a larger construction in the shape of a bird’s wing, satellite imagery and a bulletin from Korean Central Television (KCTV) revealmore...


Previous Gamera reports on the 3Yen include:
   • Gamera chomp! (3Yen / 2015-09-18)
   • Gamera camera (3Yen / 2014-03-24/)
   • Gamera captured in Tokyo’s Ginza! (3Yen / 2006-04-25)
‘Turtles can fly’ premieres in Japan (3Yen / 2005-07-27)
   • Nagasaki’s mutant Crocotutle scare (3Yen / 2010-08-13)


Furoshiki for your feet

First there were traditional Japanese jikatabiaka “ninja shoes”.
are still used today by Japanese workers who need more agility, safety and grip than regular construction boots.

Then there are the rip-offs of Japanese jikatabi such as Nike’s “Air Rift” split-toe shoes (L) barefoot-shoes-124x85.jpgand Vibram’s fucky “FiveFingers” footwear (R)
that have a dedicated fanbase of freakazoids who love playing with their toes (3Yen / 2007-12-31).

Now there is the freakier Furoshiki* wrap shoe.

Created by Japanese designer Masaya Hashimoto for Vibram, the company describes it as:

Latest and greatest innovation in alternative footwear…the Furoshiki! The concept for this type of footwear was derived from the Japanese custom of packaging items by wrapping them in cloth fabric. Furoshiki is the only sole on the market that wraps around the entire foot.vibram.com | Furoshiki

furoshiki is actually a traditional
Furoshiki are an oversized square wrapping cloths, dyed in a variety of colors and patterns. Japanese use them to bundle and carry anything, often gifts such this red cloth bundle of 3Yen bribe money (above left). The use of the furoshiki goes back to the 14th century but in recent years furoshiki have fallen out of favor and sadly are thought of as old-fashioned (rather than clever and ecological shopping bags).



Question posed on reddit:

I was wondering automation and its effects on the workforce. Given that Hitachi has now introduced the first AI managers. Will automation change “employment” as we know it in the coming years?

My answer:
┏[-_-]┛ WELCOME TO OUR ROBOT OVERLOADS …not. ┗[-_-]┓

The AI [artificial intelligence] of those “AI managers” does not mean they are bosses. The so-called “AI managers” are just software schedulers of logistics tasks using some AI. All major shipping companies have been using such software for years—the same for taxi companies, auto parts warehouses, and gambling casino management.

According to Hitachi’s press release (2015-09-15), the company is just trying to smooth out allocation production resources using better scheduling and prediction of factory job orders. These are not robot “managers” bossing humans around—just fancy computer calendars tied into Excel spreadsheets, <yawn>.

By integrating artificial intelligence technology into Hitachi’s automation for logistics tasks, they were able to verify an 8% improvement in efficiency. Cool! However, that’s what Amazon.com, UPS, Walmart, and every supermarket chain has been doing for the past 20 years.

The key point is that Hitachi’s AI technology is trying predict glitches in their production and figure out whether improvements/keizen actually work together to boast production. For example, a 200% improvement in the Widget bolt tightening also must have a 200% improvement in the Widget locking washer placement and picking/fitting of bolts before they’re tightened.

Bottom line: Move along folks—Nothing to see here, yet.

Previous 3Yen reports on the myths of Japanese robotics include:


Is Pink Soy Sauce really Japan’s best?

The Pink Soy Sauce using red beets* from Tottori Prefecture took first place in the “So there! Awards 2015.” That competition of local specialities was run by CLUB 47 representing the newspapers of Japan’s 47 prefectures.
The prefecture’s precious pink puke sauce was judged the best because of its, bright pink features qualities that are concealed in regular soy sauceSankei News (2015-Sept-17).pink-vs-black

Previous saucy reports on the 3Yen include:



Dr. Hajime Kimata of Japan jointly won* the Ig Nobel Medicine Prize for experiments to study the biomedical benefit of intense kissing (and other intimate, interpersonal ACTS).


UPDATE from today’s The Japan Times below…

*Please note that Japan always “wins” the Ig Nobel prize. Refer to:

More about Dr. NakaMats and his performance of his “swan song” this year in our Comments section.